Dating an up tight man gel
If he grew in a household where parents saved and never wasted a thing that would be another thing to account for. But in the event of dissolution of the marriage, I only get a half of the increase in the value of the house. Of course, numerous factors take part in the way in which your man spends his money and you should not automatically jump to the conclusion that he is cheap.
This really is a question for a matrimonial lawyer to answer. If the value doesn't increase, I get nothing, even though I'd be paying half toward the mortgage and upkeep of the house. If you answer most of these questions in the negative, we urge you to take a closer look at this man and clarify why you are considering marriage. It can only mean that he thinks about money more than he cares about the dreams he can make come true.
You also asked about the splitting of assets. However, you will have to be willing to accept that aspect of his personality without trying to change it. At the beginning it didn't bother me because I have my own income, but with time I began to resent it and feel hurt.
Also the pre-nuptials that he wants is that I'd move into his house, and we'll split all expenses. For most women, cheap with money means selfish with feelings. If that is the case and if you both care about each other and enjoy each other's company, you may be able to build a framework for a good marriage. It makes me feel not valued and not cherished, like I'm not worth enough for him to invest money on me.
Furthermore, if he is cheap about all areas of life, it seems it would be very difficult for you or anyone to live in such a situation. As our dating progressed it became obvious to me that he is cheap. People work hard for their money and they will only spend it if they want to. The way a man chooses to spend his money says a lot about how generous and giving he is with his feelings. When you think about your answer, clarify how much his attitude toward money will have an impact on everyday life should you decide to marry.
One of the best things about being in a relationship is having someone to take care of, give gifts to, and be generous with. From our perspective, however, this man's suggestions are not unreasonable. He may also have a generous spirit when it comes to matters that do not involve money.
You need to know how this man deals with the day-to-day expenses of living, and if he is as cheap as he seems to be with what he considers luxuries. It could be that except for certain attitudes about money and luxury, the man you are seeing may have overall lifestyle expectations that are similar to yours. Because we only have a certain amount of money we can spend freely, we spend it on the things we value.
He owns real estate and has a very nice income and few expenses. He refuses to buy me flowers or go to nice restaurants.
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